ART BY TIFFANY CHAN
By SIMONE YU
It is not easy being a Beyonce, but we can always try to be more confident.
Self-confidence is linked to almost every single element needed to live a happy and fulfilling life, such as managing stress and building resilience and motivation. The more confident you become, the more likely you will pursue your goals without fear of failure. Taking more shots will mean having more of them. And that just cannot happen if you do not have the confidence to take those chances.
Firstly, confident individuals set the bar high for themselves. They are self-assured in their abilities, so during high-stress situations such as interviews, competitions or presentations, they have the determination to work towards goals that appear “impossible” for others.
Quite contrarily, unconfident individuals set their bar low and receive mediocre results in the end because of the lack of faith they have in themselves. These individuals do not believe they can achieve high, leading to a result that reflects their expectations. If you are uncertain, how can you convince anyone—much less yourself—that you are capable of achieving incredible feats?
Of course, in no way is this a justification for overconfidence or arrogance, but if there is enough courage in a person to strive for something they want, then it is more likely that they are going to get it.
Additionally, confidence lets people say yes to opportunities, whether it be a job opening, singing in front of an audience or even just babysitting. Individuals who lack self-confidence say ‘no’ more often, because they do not want to deal with the possibility of failure or embarrassment. Therefore, they think, There are so many things that can go wrong. With confidence, you will be able to avoid beating yourself up for simple mistakes. Remarkably, as people keep trying new things, they will discover that mistakes are a normal part of life and handle failures by looking forward to what they can do rather than looking back at what they did not do.
Although self-confidence is essential for living the life you want, it is not easy to achieve. I had trouble stepping out of my comfort zone myself as setbacks and failures stabbed me with anxiety and shame. It was and sometimes is still hard for me to accept failures with a growth mindset. When the spotlight is on me in class or public, I instinctively overthink my every move, destroying my motivation to try opportunities I had wanted to take. However, as I struck up the courage to try out for the 8th-grade promotion speech competition, I actually won and beat dozens of people who I thought were better than me.
Ultimately, the experience truly changed my mindset on how important confidence is. When I walk into a room, I used to think, They are all looking at me. They all think I look stupid and weird. But the truth is that people are too wrapped up in their own thoughts and worries to be thinking about me. Building up more of my confidence allowed me to get out of my head and pursue opportunities I genuinely wanted to take.
It might even seem counterintuitive, but when people build their self-confidence, they are less focused on themselves. People enjoy interactions with others more because they are not worrying about the impression they are making or comparing themselves to others. When people are not preoccupied with their own self-doubt, they are more likely to notice the troubled look on their friend’s face or the melancholy look in their date’s eyes. In essence, they can be the person who reaches out to help others.
Moreover, confidence can aid people to consider more opportunities. Individuals who lack the confidence are underestimated, unheard and unfairly treated. On the other hand, people who are confident with their abilities believe that their own voice matters, infusing them with the ambition to achieve what they want. Confident individuals are not pushed down by criticism and instead are confident that they will prove their critics wrong.
Believe it or not, confidence is what makes you more attractive. If someone walked in a room, they would easily be more drawn to the guy standing upright with a hearty smile than the woman slouching down and looking around the room nervously. Ask any job interviewer to choose between these two candidates, and the person with the hearty smile will most likely get the job. Confidence leads to so many crucial moments in our life, and if we spent most of our life worrying about what could go wrong then you are not really living the life you want.
The next time you hesitate to do something you want, just do it. 30 seconds of ambitious courage can seriously change your life.